86 How to stop caring about what people think
No. 86 – 28 Jul 2024
Welcome to the 86th edition of the True Progress Newsletter, a weekly newsletter on mastering fear and anxiety for optimal performance.
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INSIGHTS
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If you're challenging yourself in your work, fear of other people's opinions (FOPO) may creep up on you. The main obstacle in overcoming this fear is not recognizing what is within your control and what is not.
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The more you let FOPO control you, the more emotionally unstable you become, constantly adjusting your actions to seek approval, and that's no way to live. You start looking to please others and be liked rather than follow your values.
This leads to inauthenticity and a fear of exposure, causing you to avoid challenges for career growth.
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"The result is that, if he wins applause, he returns home full of himself; but if he is booed, he shrivels as if the air has been let out of him and sinks down, deflated. Our case is much the same. What do we value? Externals. What do we look after? Externals. So of course, we are going to experience fear and nervousness. Faced with external circumstances that we judge to be bad, we cannot help but be frightened and apprehensive."
— Epictetus
CHALLENGE
Think about three recent events or situations you can't change and haven't fully accepted yet. These might include people's attitudes, actions, missing out on an opportunity, the past, and so on.
Things within your control include your thoughts, attitudes, words, and actions.
What external obstacles or internal roadblocks are preventing you from accepting them?
⌾ Reply to this email and let us know how it went
SYSTEMS
How to declutter your mind and make sense of your insights:
Capturing ideas and organizing them visually with a branching, tree-like structure is a timeless and infinitely flexible tool for brainstorming and understanding.
Pick a problem or idea
Draw branches radiating from the problem or idea
Add sub-branches
Continue branching outward for each idea
BOOK REC
Mastery by Robert Greene
Becoming great at your craft requires two key elements:
Finding a mentor if you want to have the most efficient and productive form of learning since mentors know where to focus your attention and how to challenge you.
Navigating smoothly through the social environment. This includes knowing how to talk to others, reading others, and not letting your emotions get the best of you.
Till next week,
— Carlos & Stef
